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Misgender Roles

From our earliest days in this world, we are taught the ‘gender norms’. Our nurseries or bedrooms are typically painted pink for girls or blue for boys.

Our parents dress us in attire that matches the sex of our bodies. We are taught dolls are for girls and cars are for boys. We are instilled at this young age what is socially acceptable behavior. And, the entire idea is not to deviate from that path.

“FOR A TRANSGENDER PERSON, THIS IS A CONFUSING TIME.”

For a transgender person, this is a confusing time. Why would you be expected to play with this toy, or that toy, or wear that dress or those pants? We innately know that we are more comfortable in what we choose to wear or play with. Only recently have companies realized that clothing for young children should be gender neutral. Target has started an initiative to remove girls and boys from its clothing labels. So if you want that pink shirt or that blue shirt, it’s for a child, not a sex.

We are taught to do laundry, cook meals, clean house, and other basic chores. At this point we are educated on what we would need to know to be independent. Gone are the days of June Cleaver. It’s almost imperative that everyone knows the basic skills of home economics. As we grow older, we embrace things outside of the clothes we wear or the toys we play with. We pick up hobbies and develop other skills that help us along in life.

As a transwoman, I can feel the roles of a homemaker. I have had to live independently and know that the house won’t get cleaned or the laundry done unless I do it, but my skills go beyond that. I have replaced the water heater in my house. I’ve redone the plumbing for the shower and installed a bathroom sink. I’ve installed a storm door. I’ve replaced the alternator on my girlfriend’s Mustang. I’ve done brake jobs and redone the entire fuel system on a previous vehicle. I’ve installed air ride suspension on several vehicles. I have completely taken a vehicle apart and put it back together. I have also built another from the ground up. I am a certified welder and can read blueprints as well. I have my share of hand tools and power tools and there’s not much that I won’t tackle or take on.

“WE SHOULD NOT BE TOLD WE CAN’T DO SOMETHING OR BE SOMETHING SIMPLY BECAUSE OF OUR SEX.”

I wear heels. I wear dresses and skirts. I am a transwoman. I stand outside the typical gender roles. Gender roles are an illusion in today’s world. We should not be told we can’t do something or be something simply because of our sex. Our genders are who we are, but they don’t define what we are capable of.

Be strong. Live. Learn. And never let anyone hold you back.

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