The Fact That I Just Heard of Goat Yoga Explains a Lot About Our Culture Gap

Goat Yoga has been a thing for a couple of years, but I am just hearing about it, and that's sad--for our culture.

I never knew that Goat Yoga was a thing until I heard on the radio that the city of Suwanee, Georgia, is having their second Goat Yoga class today. When I heard that, I thought "why would anyone have more than one?" Then I googled it and found that Goat Yoga has been a thing for several years. In fact, it's "sweeping the country," according to USA Today.

Somehow, that information has eluded me.

You see, I'm in the "other America" where new cultural swings don't reach until they've oozed through every pore in American society and dropped out the other end like so many goat pellets.

I have no problem with goats, such as they are. They're fairly benign animals, and the domesticated ones are cute, and even trainable. For years, we had goats down the hill from our home (we lived in the same house for 20 years, then recently moved to a more suburban environment where goats are not seen). The goats would come when my youngest boy called them. They'd literally run from a pasture to see him and (hopefully) get a treat.

Goat motivation is very unsophisticated. They will eat practically anything. And if you have something they consider edible (not a high hurdle, as I said) in your pocket or your hand, you are automatically voted into the "Goat Friend Society."

Goats are also very, very stupid. I've had to rescue one, more than one time, from the horror of getting its horns trapped in a fence. The poor thing will try to pull itself free for hours then get exhausted if not freed. A simple turn of the head is beyond their mental faculties.

Goats are very good at removing foliage, tall grass, and weeds from places that Bushhogs and tractors cannot go. But it's unlikely they'd displace a significant number of workers, despite what the Michigan chapter of the AFSCME union claims.

After reading a bit of the Facebook page "Your Daily Goat" (yes, it's real), I am, however, convinced that goats might displace more than a few therapists. (Not to mention sex robots, but that's a very different topic, describing a use for goats that has extremely ancient roots.) That may be a good thing (displacing therapists, that is).

I've never been a fan of yoga, it being a semi-spiritual activity, not in alignment with Christianity, the center of which is a person, Christ. I do know Christians who practice yoga as a physical discipline, and it doesn't seem to affect their faith, but some Yoga instructors definitely take the tantric to the extreme. I am not sure if goats ever figured in the Hindu religious texts though.

Once a thing like Goat Yoga reaches my particular backwater of cultural ignorance, I have to think how our culture has moved out of timeless values and into fad worship, celebrity worship, and idol worship. The America that sticks to the timeless is shrinking, and the other America that I don't know is growing. That probably makes me a cultural laggard, and I'm glad of it when I read that the likes of Goat Yoga have become a thing.

​In conclusion: either Goat Yoga is a very dumb thing to engage in with farm animals; or it's an attempt at a sacrament for some perverted form of yoga. In the Bible, goats symbolize Satan and sin. Worshipping goats is associated with the worst pagan religions.

Therefore it's my earnest hope that those who practice Goat Yoga, and those who go back for more, are simply on the same level as those who name their pet rocks.

We're all safer believing that.

Comments
No. 1-9
Chris.shmo
Chris.shmo

@MittenTom I think they just enjoy feeling exclusive and imagining everyone else but them is going to Hell. It is very dark psychological issue.

MittenTom
MittenTom

David danced in front of the Ark of The Covenant. Some Christians think dancing is wrong. The logic of many fundamentalists eludes me.

Chris.shmo
Chris.shmo

It is sad and moronic that there are some Christian fundamentalists who think yoga and/or goats direct Christians to Hell. It is like they are looking to upset Christains and drive them away from Christ. I love Christ but I hate these fundamentalists that make Christians looks stupid and drive people away from Christ with this kind of BS.

Dave_Oedel
Dave_Oedel

I had to look up Tzeentch too to understand cynicalnerd's comment. To save you the trouble . . .

cynicalnerd
cynicalnerd

WTF. That's pretty much all I have to say about this other than the fact that it sounds like something Tzeentch's followers would come up with to relax.