Relax. Melania Trump Has Not Been Replaced By a Robot

Presidents and parties may come and go in Washington, but conspiracy theories remain.

It doesn’t seem to matter if which party is in power, the cottage industry of conspiracy theorists will find something sinister to be alarmed about. George W. Bush allegedly engineered the September 11 attacks. Barack Obama supposedly had secret plans to invade Texas and impose martial law. Now the internet’s self-appointed guardians against the New World Order have uncovered a conspiracy that involves President Trump.

This conspiracy doesn’t involve Russian meddling in the 2016 elections or claim that the Trump Administration is covering up second shooter in Las Vegas. The armchair warriors against “Them” are worried that – wait for it –Melania Trump is robot.

Seriously.

To be fair, not everyone thinks that Melania is robot. Some just think that she has been replaced by a flesh and blood body double.

The claim that Melania is not Melania seems to have begun with Joe Vargas, a Twitter user whose handle is “BuyLegalMeds.com.” If you need further clues as to Vargas’ credibility, his Twitter page prominently features the green cross used to identify marijuana dispensaries.

Vargas posted a CNN video clip of the president and First Lady with the caption, “This is not Melania. To think they would go this far & try & make us think its [sic] her on TV is mind blowing. Makes me wonder what else is a lie.”

Trump’s often awkward behavior and phrasing fed the conspiracy. The clip that Vargas posted began with the president referring to “my wife, Melania, who happens to be right here,” leading the woke ones to wonder why he had to remind people that Melania was right beside him if it was really Melania.

“I initially didn’t notice, but thought it was strange when he said ‘my wife Melania, she’s right here’ to try & convince media it was her,” Vargas tweeted. As further proof, the True Believers noted that Melania did not speak.

Others fed the growing conspiracy as they recalled another weird moment from a few weeks ago. Visiting Florida after Hurricane Irma, President Trump said, “I just want to thank everybody, the first responders, on behalf of myself, our vice president. Melania really wanted to be with us. It’s really touched her heart what’s gone on.”

Sounds normal, right? The only problem [cue spooky music] is that Melania was standing right beside President Trump the whole time. The video of the moment has gone viral.

“Yo they’re actually using a fake Melania Trump stunt double,” Treymeister89 tweeted. The laughing emoticons in his tweet suggest that Trey is not treating the crisis with the gravity that it deserves.

In a tweet that has apparently been deleted, “Pumpkinsauce” claimed, “Melania trump was replaced by a very lifelike robot 14 years ago the only giveaway from this remarkable machine is the cold, dead eyes.” Perhaps “They” hacked into his account to delete the tweet.

Strangely enough, Business Insider, not known for conspiracy reporting pointed out that there is a real woman in the Trump entourage, presumably a Secret Service agent, who bears a striking resemblance to Melania. The two have been photographed together on numerous occasions. It isn’t clear whether the mysterious woman was also present when the Vargas video was made or at the press conference in Florida.

There is no evidence that the presumed Secret Service agent has ever acted as a double for Melania. If her purpose was to be a body double, it is unlikely that the Secret Service would put her in place to be photographed with Melania, essentially blowing her cover.

Occam’s Razor holds that the simplest explanation is usually the right one. The simplest explanation in this case is that Melania is Melania and that President Trump is poor public speaker when he doesn’t have prepared remarks. The president has had other gaffes that were plainly not slips that uncovered a sinister conspiracy. For example, it was only last week that Trump said that he met with the president of the Virgin Islands when Trump himself is the president of the Virgin Islands since they are a US territory.

Much of the fuss is satire or people mocking the True Believers, but quite a few seem to seriously believe that Melania is not Melania. As shocking as it may seem, I suspect that Vargas may have crafted the original tweet as a viral marketing tool for his “medicinal” internet business.

The bottom line on the Melania body double conspiracy is a simple one: This is your brain on drugs. Don’t do drugs.

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