Mr. Nobody

He used to be the King of New Jersey. Now, not so much.

You ever see Goodfellas? I'm sure Chris Christie has. In fact, right about now I'd lay odds that he's thinking about something Henry Hill said near the end of the movie. After ratting out his mob buddies to the feds, Hill goes into witness protection--but it's not exactly the lifestyle he enjoyed as a wiseguy. In fact, it's downright boring:

Today, everything is different. There's no action. I have to wait around like everyone else. Can't even get decent food. Right after I got here, I ordered some spaghetti with marinara sauce and I got egg noodles and ketchup. I'm an average nobody. I get to live the rest of my life like a schnook.

Apparently it's the same for airports, as the former governor found out during a recent pass through Newark:

The two-term Republican, who left office on Jan. 16, was blocked from a VIP entrance he had used for eight years, and directed to stand in Transportation Security Administration screening lines at Terminal B like anyone else.

You mean like a schnook.

The order came from police for the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey, which operates the airport, according to the person, who wasn’t authorized to speak publicly about security matters.

Well, rules are rules--but could there be a another reason that the Port Authority cops were being such sticklers with Christie?

The Port Authority also operates the George Washington Bridge, the target of a plot by Christie aides and allies to tie up traffic for political punishment in 2013.


Word is that the guv complied without raising a fuss, which is good--and marks a direct contrast from his behavior during Beachgate, the incident that launched a thousand memes.

So may I be the first to welcome you to the real world, Chris? It's not so bad, really. You might even get used to it. Just be sure to factor in an extra 30 or 40 minutes for that table at Applebee's--especially if it's a Friday night.

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I think schnook is too benign an epithet for Mr. Christie. I was thinking more like....schmuck!


I think President Trump has an opening for someone to make late night runs to McDonalds. Not sure is CC would be good fit. Not sure if could make it back to the White House without eating to food.