Ka-Ching! Obama to get $400K for Wall Street Speech

Barack Obama must have a hell of an agent.

Fresh off a book deal with Random House that will reportedly earn the former president and his wife Michelle a combined $65 million, Obama has now booked his first Wall Street speaking gig–and if Charlie Gasparino at Fox Business is correct, it’s gonna be a doozy.

Cantor-Fitzgerald, the premiere investment firm, musf be really excited to have Obama as the keynote speaker at their upcoming health care conference for them to pony up $400 grand. On the other hand, if anyone knows what a wreck America’s health care system has become since the (Un)Affordable Health Care Act, it would be the man who unleashed it on an unsuspecting public. I just hope the guy who writes the speech for him negotaties a share of the gross, because by the time Obama’s people get done spinning this thing the total take from his appearance will probably look like a Hollywood balance sheet.

And what of poor Hillary? Not only has she seen her own speaking fees plummet after losing the election to Donald Trump, now she has to suffer the ignominy of seeing her old boss double the average haul she used to get giving speeches to the same bunch of fat cats! Talk about a wage gap. When a woman only makes $3,000 a minute to a man’s $6,000, that’s all the proof you need that sexism is alive and well in America.

(On a side note, I’m available for speaking engagements at a much lower price. I will also work for Home Depot gift cards.)

Of course, at this point we’re all well aware of how shameless our political class is when it comes to cashing in on their so-called public service–but this, coming from a guy who literally once suggestedthat at some point a person has made enough money–demonstrates a cynicism that is breathtaking, even by DC standards. Don’t get me wrong: as a capitalist, I have zero problem with someone maximizing his profit potential. What makes me want to barf is how government has turned into such a big favor factory that Wall Street firms think it’s a good investment to throw wads of money even at former politicians. It also makes me wonder what kind of bang Cantor-Fitzgerald thinks it will get for its Barack Obama bucks. Could it have anything to do with whatever he and Valerie Jarrett have been cooking up just down the street from the White House?

Our politics really needs an enema.

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