In Which John McCain Saves America From Filthy Cowards

Today, America finally welcomes its real hero in a town particularly bereft of heroes.

Sen. John McCain returns to rally the GOP, and hopefully, save America.

John McCain: carrier jet pilot, Navy Captain, disabled American veteran, prisoner of war, Vietnam veteran, U.S. senator, former GOP nominee for President of the United States, American hero. He will finally be welcomed in a town that spent decades deriding him.

His appearance could not be more timely. The Senate will vote on something today–either a naked repeal of Obamacare, or some version of the troubled BCRA. But in order to even get there, Majority Leader Mitch McConnell needs 50 votes to begin debate on the reconciliation bill from the House. McCain is likely the 50th vote.

Who would vote “no” with him in the chamber? In Washington, imagery is everything, and nobody–nobody–wants to be labeled the jerk who sent McCain home to die of cancer. If it’s possible for a GOP senator to be less popular than Great Ormond Street hospital, that would do it.

Sympathy, however will only get you so far. Yes, the 80-year-old has endured insults and death wishes, and even hard-hearted Democrats know that he is the best rallying cry the GOP possesses this day.

No, Mr. Corn, you pig, you miserable vomitous mass. It’s conceivable that the GOP has already laid down to die because it lacks the strength to keep even the weakest of campaign promises. It’s possible that Obamacare will never be repealed, like disgraced and ousted John Boehner thinks.

But maybe they do have something left.

It’s possible that McCain will save America from the hell of single-payer insurance that Democrats have already begun preparing. Sens. Gillibrand, Warren, Baldwin and Booker are like vultures gathering over a corpse to feast on its bloated flesh.

If they fail–the very instant Obamacare’s repeal fails, watch them circle around Schumer and the White House to move Trump into full-cooperation mode. Then America will have its own Charlie Gard.

Any Republican who votes against what John McCain, forgotten hero of a forgotten war in Vietnam, raised himself out of his own personal cancer battle to fly to Washington, descend into a pit of vipers and personally support, is a shameful filthy coward.

It’s possible that all the pundits are right and that this is a dead issue.

But John McCain doesn’t think so. The GOP might be dead as a doornail, and any chance at repealing Obamacare might be as far-fetched as President Trump becoming humble.

I’d rather believe that heroes still exist, and that John McCain, being one, will save the day, and America.