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Another example of "Idiocracy" predicting the future.

Women now sad to learn that you can't postpone motherhood indefinitely.

There's a popular meme on social media that the 2005 movie "Idiocracy" is the "only movie that started out as a comedy and is turning into a documentary. It first became popular during the 2016 election as people pointed to Donald Trump as proof that our society had taken a turn for the dumb. But liberals aren't the only ones complaining and it isn't just about Trump. There's also the continuing coarseness of our entertainment, increasing profanity, ubiquitous advertisements, the "Big Ass fries," Windows 8. Fast food restaurants even have cash registers that show pictures of food with the price pre-programmed. Can hospitals be far behind?

And now we have further proof that "Idiocracy" is becoming our reality. The opening scene depicts a middle-class couple named Trevor and Carol discussing all the reasons they are choosing to postpone parenthood. In the end, a visibly aged Carol states that Trevor has passed away, but she had some eggs frozen in hopes that "the right guy comes along."

I don't know if the fictional Carol ever managed to reproduce. But the poster-girl for the egg-freezing movement in the real world just found out that the procedure doesn't offer any guarantees. Brigitte Adams, who posed for the cover of Bloomberg Businessweek under the headline, “Freeze your eggs, Free your career.” had her eggs thawed but failed to conceive. A single, blonde Vassar graduate the real Brigitte bears an uncanny resemblance to the fictional Carol.

Brigitte had her eggs frozen while still in her 30's in the hopes of getting married later and finally having children. But at 45 and still single, she had her eggs thawed so that she could undergo in-vitro fertilization. Of the eleven eggs she had frozen, two did not survive the thawing process, three failed to fertilize, five embryos were abnormal and the final one failed to implant.

I can sympathize with women like Brigitte. I never had children, largely because I didn't find a decent man to marry me until I was 40. We briefly discussed having children but decided we were too old. I once read the process described as "creeping non-choice," meaning that women often never made a conscious decision not to have children, but by postponing motherhood indefinitely, they found there was no longer a decision to make. But with today's technology, some women are under the impression that motherhood can wait for as long as they want. They can finish school, get married, establish careers, buy homes and THEN when the time is right for them, have children. The reality is not quite as certain. Although magazine covers depict actresses joyfully becoming mothers in their 40's (Janet Jackson did it at FIFTY!) most women will be unable to conceive naturally at that age. Chances of conceiving with your own eggs, even with in-vitro, are only 25% at age 40. It drops dramatically after that.

And as Brigitte Adams discovered, even freezing your eggs can't guarantee motherhood.

What a sad irony in our society that so many women are filing into abortion clinics in their 20's and fertility clinics in their 40's. The feminist movement has convinced millions of women that they could "have it all." It was a lie. Nobody "has it all." Life is about choices and trade-offs. If you want children, it may mean foregoing career advancement. If you opt to postpone motherhood, you may find it out of reach. Those who advocate "choices" for women should at least be aware of the consequences of those choice.

And, just as with the horrors of abortion & aftermath on the mothers, we'll not hear anything about this issue except how "perfect" it can be for women! How sad.

If one wishes to postpone /not have children until later, there IS the option of adoption! Maybe be able to save a child from the butcher down the street from the fertility clinic.

Twelve years ago at my 30th high school reunion one of my classmates did exactly this above scenario. She looked like death warmed over because she was caring for a 4 and 6 year old while working a demanding full time job. Here's another non-guarantee that you'll have the type of control of your career at 45 with the flexibility to be the type of parent you want to be. If anything it will be the opposite.

This section is everything: What a sad irony in our society that so many women are filing into abortion clinics in their 20's and fertility clinics in their 40's. The feminist movement has convinced millions of women that they could "have it all." It was a lie. Nobody "has it all."

That is very true. For most people, career responsibilities and pressures increase from entry until retirement, or at least close to it. The women delaying children for careers are typically in fields where they expect advancement or the building of a business. That typically adds responsibility and makes free time even harder to come by. It is very rare to find someone that wishes they had put their career first and waited to have kids (other than those that had them really young, unmarried, etc.). However, you will find many on the other end. Properly caring for children is time consuming, stressful and takes a lot of energy. Most people have less energy as they age, making it harder. My wife and I were married 6 years before we had kids. We did that because we wanted to spend time with each other and build a good marital relationship to build parenting on. I know too many people who spend their entire parenting experience waiting for the kids to be bigger, then self-sufficient, then out of the house because they jumped right into parenthood immediately after marriage. They never had an opportunity to be a young married couple. When they next have that experience, they are not young anymore. I was also married at 24. If we had not married until 30, that clock would have needed to be accelerated. Life is about choices. There is nothing like the unconditional love that you will feel for your child and it is worth every bit of the time, money and stress it takes to do it.

Women miss the point. The whole point of finding a decent man early (which mandates getting over the adolescent fantasies about "Bad Boys") is precisely so that they can finish school and start a career. If you have kids when you're young enough, you might even had grand parents who can help. And when the first kid gets old enough, he helps raise the younger ones. But women don't do that. They go it alone. Women can have it all, just not all at once and just not alone. They want three decades of hard work in three years and with a fraction of the effort.

Interesting read Merrie. Thanks.

No career is better than raising the next generation.


Just to be clear, I DID marry in my 20's. But I chose poorly the first time (and apparently the second time since my husband walked out on me right before Christmas and now I'm getting divorced AGAIN.