With the rising threat of internet pornography, computer viruses, leaks of sensitive data, and other scourges, it is time to regulate the speed both of computers as well as their access to the Internet in order to help prevent these threats.
Many years ago, the height of connectivity was a 56k modem or, for those well-connected among us, a 144k ISDN line. We did not have to fear computer viruses, as we were forced to manually connect and then disconnect our dial-up modems from the Internet or walled-garden web services. The speed at which images downloaded over a dial-up line meant that most people opted for printed images for their pornography needs. Our financial, medical, credit, and other sensitive data were “hosted” in filing cabinets, rather than online. Finally, we did not have to worry about “fake news” on the internet (indeed, we had no way to differentiate real from fake).
It is time to return to this more peaceful time. I am a firm believer in the First Amendment, but call on the government to step in to properly regulate this privilege granted to us by the U.S. Constitution. Our Founding Fathers could never have anticipated the Internet or the threats that it poses. They used printing presses and were able to win the propaganda war against the British with them. Surely, we can make do as well, especially since we no longer have a need to fear the government as it has our best interests at heart.
Therefore, in order to stop the misuse of computers, I will turn mine in. I have a high velocity computer with way more processor speed and memory that any sane person needs, and an Internet connection that is much faster than reasonable. I have no need for these weapons; they should only be in the hands of well-trained government workers. I will make do with my grandfather’s typewriter and subscribe to a printed paper.
Will you join me and voluntarily turn in your high velocity computers? Or, at least return to 56k modems? If it saves just one data breach, virus infection, or online hazing incident, then it is worth it.